I am not sure where I am going to get my motivation, but I am still riding the highs and lows of how my body changes with each Lupus Flare. I won't go into to much detail as it does not matter but when I flare I tend to treat my body very poorly out of frustration/ depression what ever. I need to find the strength or motivation to want the best for myself regardless.
Good news the last few weeks I have been able to sneak in a few 6 mile trail runs with friends, I find walking causes me more issues than running so I am avoiding walking (except when needing the walk break while running).
I am climbing back on the saddle of self worth-respect for myself and see what becomes of it.
I am erasing running goals of 100 mile races, 50 mile races and even any race. I would be very happy to be able to run with friends once or twice a week and not fall so far behind. I remember days of being in the front of that pack, now at 15 minutes I lose sight... that's alright I was there years ago when I started running the first time, so I know that it is possible, the rest is up to me and lupus..