weight loss 10-21-12

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 185 (9-6-13)

LW: 216

CW: 215
WL: - 1bs..

No idea how this happened I ate everything that was not attached and splurged in cocktails for 4 nights in a row..

Weigh in 10-13-2012

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 185 (9-6-13)

LW: 218

CW: 216
WL: - 2lbs..


Not sure if I am really down this 2 lbs or if it is a dehydration thing as I was not down all week even though i had a good week of workouts and diet. But last night was my Methotrexate night and really made me sick so I am thinking that by Monday when I am recovered I will most likely be back up probably at least a lb of it.

Throw in the towel

Boy last night I just wanted to throw in the towel and say Fuck it, it is not worth it , I can't fight against a body that is not willing any longer.

I was so sore and beaten down last night it hurt to blink and do any other, even sitting still my joints were on fire. I was so close to mixing a cocktail and prdering a pizza and saying, I can find a way to be happy with this... I do not need to run races, I can just crew people and be part of them that way.

Then I told myself to shut the fuck up and stop whining like a little bitch. drank water for the evening and said just get through the night.

Well here I am today with a some what renewed spirit and ready to tackle life again. I am not grateful for this disease it does not make me a stronger person. But I have it so guess what I have to deal with it and move on.

interesting article on ITBS and the strengthening or mechanics

Of eliminating or minimizing it.

http://tptherapy.com/unlock-your-body-anatomy-quads.php

Weigh in 10-6-2012

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 185 (9-6-13)

LW: 220

CW: 218
WL: - 2lbs... 

So there you have it I lost the 2 lbs that I had gained back. from oktoberfesting, still a loss and on track of -2 lbs a week with little to no exercise at all. I did manage one nice bluff hike on Sunday with our younger dog Cooper approx three miles. it was a great hike.

Then Wednesday I managed a really nice 4 mile run and bluff climb  with my friend Deb who also has Lupus. three days of weights and core work. I need to maybe add a 4th day of core and hip flexors, having a lot of pain in those areas, that I think are a muscle/skeletal problem. also coming from a vertebrae problem (slightly bulged) so continuing with core will only have rewards in the long run and I need to remember that.

 Really focusing on clean whole food from as local farm as possible.

Weigh in 9-29-2012

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 185 9-6-13 

LW: 218

CW: 220
WL: + 2lbs... I am fine with that on several levels, one I am flaring so I am full of inflammation, 2. I did not understand the loss of 9 lbs the week before, 3. I am on prednisone which can do funky things to you.. I still plan on being down next week though.

I did manage 4 days of core and three days of weights and I did manage one 5-6 mile run/hike so it was a good week. I hope to get another run hike tomorrow and another on Wednesday... But being back on Chemotherapy meds as of last week and already given the orders to increase them this week I know there will be a few days of not feeling well enough to run/hike.  Food and drink was perfect this week again. Today though will be my exception I have the Oktoberfest parade and I am sticking with tradition if for no other reason than my wife enjoys the parade more if I celebrate with her. so some Bloody marys' stout, and junk food will be eaten.


I switched my goal from 195 to 185.

Weigh in 9:23:12

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 227

CW: 218
WL: -9bs  ???? I have no idea how I lost nine lbs. but a miles stone was hit, 50lb mark. :)

TL: 53lbs, 23lbs to go. :) these will take a lot of work I bet.

New approach to training

I am done training, I am not sure but I think I get to mental and commit to things that my body was not able to handle and nor is able to handle anymore. I can say that in the past three weeks even while flaring I have "handled" three very nice 5-6 mile hikes, mostly hiking with just a smidge of running thrown in just for the soul.  So I think if I take the training out of what I enjoy maybe I might get to enjoy more of what I enjoy and who knows, I might even be able to enjoy some really long distances in the process.

weight loss thread and / Goose Bumps 6 hour Run

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 234 (9-2-2012)

CW: 227
WL: -7bs


Weight loss is going well, I did have a bit of a stopage for what ever reason, most likely because my body was flaring awful, could not even pick up a plastic cup. Beack on prednisone and looking at either Chemo again or Benlysta infusions, or other.. If I had my way it would be other, then chemo then Benlysta, but I think my Dr. is thinking Benlysta first... I am going to have a talk with hi and share my feelings on why. and see what he says.


6 Hour Run. Less than a week now until the Goose Bumps 6 hour fun run here in La Crosse, It is a free event held on a 2.77 mile loop any and all donations after expenses will be given to the Local Lupus Alliance Inc. not for profit.. The aid station will have gummy bears, M&M's, Water, licorice, pretzels, Vi Endurance Energy Gels, there are two bathrooms almost right on the course. 80 percent easy rolling trail path 20 percent gravel road. If you would like to show up let me know. richardchrz@Centurytel,.net

Plan on bringing a beverage to drink at the end and hang around for some grilled burgers.

weight loss thread and / Goose Bumps 6 hour Run

Weight Loss thread 9-2-12

SW: 271 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 238 (about two weeks ago)

CW: 234
WL: -4bs

Well I was hoping to hit 235 in the following week, so it does not suck that I hit it sooner.... pretty close to perfect on diet and did pretty good on exercise with all things considered. I did mostly core work with some extra focus on strengthening hip flexors. I managed to ride a bike 3 times.. that seems to be an issue but I am not stopping, the issue meaning it hurts my wrists (Lupus arthritis) so bad that it feels like somebody hit them with a baseball bat. Yesterdays 5.2 mile bike ride required 8 very strong Narcotics following through out the day and into the night (roughly 3:00 Am before I was able to get comfortable enough to sleep, and at one point my ankles hurt enough that I felt like I had just run a 100K.. but like I said I am not giving in.. I will continue to at least bike and use it as a mode of transportation. I biked to the farmers market once, that was a 13.8 mile round trip. Tomorrow I plan on biking to the Chiropractor and back that will be roughly 20 miles (will bring a pack to get some groceries, also plan on riding to get my hair cut as well.. plus to the co-op to get groceries so that will end up being probably close to 16-18 mile round trip... I will try and manage one more 5-7 mile ride as well plus 4 days of core... I am looking forward to 231 now and being down 40lbs... and 40 more to go after that. :) I have this refreshed sense of why I am doing this, it is no longer all about needing to be lighter for running but rather, loose the weight, strengthen my lungs, muscles and heart for me and any other benefits (like lighter runner) are going to be just icing on the cake. 

Writing this on 9-3-12 which is my Birthday 40th.. so I had a bigger breakfast today but all healthy foods and planning on hiking later to burn some of it and a dinner with some wine tonight but still a healthy meal is planned.. so I guess I might be up a lb from today but it should only be inflammation not fat.

Weightloss thread 8-26-12

SW: 270 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 248 (about two weeks ago)

CW: 238
WL: -10lbs

I am still very hopeful to be running shortly, but in the mean time I need to keep my weight coming off, I had fallen a bit and it climbed back up in the upper 240's but I am feeling controlled as i ever have for losing weight with my diet. I fully expect to be 220's  by the end of sept and low 200's by the end of the year. I am still counting on the 35 mile at Tuscobia as well. I would be very happy to see 235 in the next 10 days.

Dreaming superior

All I did last night was sleep and dream of Sawtooth... honestly I can say that probably 40 percent of my dreams last night were spen running the sawtooth course and or how I would run it different. There was really a stupid detour on it in my dreams...


hmm, think this means I need a trail run.. hopefully next week.

2012 Tuscobia 50K / 75 Mile / 150 Mile Winter Ultra

I think I might actually get to participate in this race this year. I will be taking the lesser distance but with any luck there could be a decent amount of snow and I could take advantage of a winter run pulling the pulk just to get  a nice training run with 50 plus lbs in it.

The race started two years ago with Tim Roe as the race director and last year Helen and Chris took it over. I was not able to run it either because of health conditions and the past few years the date has been on my families Christmas celebration and I do my best to keep my running from interfering with family even though I would rather run this.

It appears the 2012 date is going to be Dec 28th-30th with a possible New Years eve party. not sure I will stay around for that, depends on what Mrs. Chrz wants to do for New Years Eve. But I hope to be up there for the 50K... would make a nice long run for me at my current condition.

Speaking of current condition, this last week I was having a fantastic week and then some things went wrong towards the end but I think it is minor and can get through it and back on the trails with in the week... no hurry my next race is not until Dec 30th :)... so I figure I only need to be in a fairly strong 20 plus mile on the trails by then with or without sled.. and I can fake the last 11 miles..

Weight loss thread 7-30-2012

SW: 270 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 242

CW: 248
WL: -+ 6 lbs

All I can say for a sure is I was "not" very good to myself diet wise and everything else in my training and life seemed to follow..

15 miles of running, :(
15 mile of walking poor to average
30 miles of bike and rollerblaedes my body was hurting I was fatigued..I found this to be about the only way I could get extra time in... 20 of thes miles were on Sunday and 7 miles were rollerbladding on Saturday... 

I hope things turn a bit for the better this week.. I have so much inflammation of those six lbs gain all of them are inflammation and i probably gained a few in lbs as well, because I did see 239 on the scale on monday or Tuesday.... 

I feel like a 2 if the scale was 0-10 in energy and over all wellness. What I need this week is minimum 20 miles of running I have a 5 mile monster hill technical hill route planned out.hope to swing that 5 times minimum 3 times this week. need to get 21 miles of walking. and any other is bonus.

I am putting my self down for 3 X 20 of core and one weigh session this week as well. I hate every aspect of both but one thing is for certain, after each run my lower back is hurting, I can't keep having a sore back so I need to strengthen the area.. booo..

Weight loss thread and weeks totals 7-22-12

SW: 270 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 246

CW: 242
WL: -4 lbs


I question this -4 lbs a bit. I weighed in yesterday at 245 which was still a success because the day after the 246 weigh in a week ago I was up to 251, all poison and sludge.... and yesterday after my big day of hills I was 240..... I think I will know what I really weigh tomorrow. I am happy with the 245 of yesterday and would ecstatic if I weighed in at 242 that will give me a legit chance at 239 in the following week.


I also had a big week of exercising, I say exercising and not running because it was a good mixture of both. I still have today to accomplish so totals could be bumped by 3-6 miles.. but I have hit 45 miles this week with with 17 of them from walking. I had a big day if hills yesterday did 5 bluff climbs in 9.36 miles.. Sport tracks said I had 2,909 of gain and 2,931 of loss.. garmin training center said I had almost 4,000 of gain and of loss.. I tend to think it was closer to the sport tracks.... my honest guess would have been 3,300 of gain and of loss... so combined total of 6,600.... either way the last climb i had to will myself several times.. I was right next to my truck and I was out of energy.. stopped 6 times minimum and sat down.. just to get my heart rate back down.. closer to the bouldering section I was actually getting a little light headed but I rested again and then pulled myself up and over knowing that was the top and could go down from there.. I was so tired that I actually took a wrong turn on one of the trails.. never have done that on this section... any way.. it was a great workout sure to be some benefit from it.. will repeat this one every other week or so hoping for improved strength by the last 2-3 climbs..


It was nice to be on a few of those climbs have not been on two of them since 2010. They are the technical gnarly trails I like.

Dances with Dirt 10K

went into this happy to have ran Afton 25K the week before with out to much damage. I have developed a case of shin splints on my left leg need to address that. When I saw the profile and looked at the elevation clearer it was then I realized that this is going to be no average 10K distance even for a trail run.

With my recent learning at Afton about my apparent extreme weakness in climbing I went from a finish time in my head of 1:10-1:15 to thinking I would be out there 1:45. Ok though it would build me up some more strength.

Started the race at the parking lot and went out through a parking lot along a golf course... after a mile we really had not run one thing yet that resembled a trail I was starting to complain..LOL.. finally ducked into some woods maybe around 2 miles, they were not that technical, still complaining.. :) (sorry I like good single track)  this profile is a bit deceiving the second climb is far worse than the first one as the second one does not have any switch backs in the woods like the first... the second one was pretty much just a long up a ski hill hike, and it seemed to never end.... Thank goodness for the down hill section from the 2.5 mile mark to the 3.5 mile mark..I just let it go and did not care about if I fell.. I think I passed at least 20 some runners I did that mile in 8 minutes... there were plenty of places to fall as it was tall grass covering ruts in the trail but I have always been pretty decent at hill bombings and today it worked as well.. once over the ski hill the I should have bombed the second hill down but my quads were already sore from the first one so I just ran it moderate..... from there a flat finish... finished up with a 1:32 so on the low side of my new projected.

Post race was what it was all about for me, Watched Mike Henze come through sub 5 on the 50K and Renee and I sat with him at the finish and we pounded beers for a few hours (4 -5 hours I am thinking) It was nice to sit and enjoy a few with him. As well as we know each other we have never had this opportunity.

I think I will go back to this race again, not sure of which distance... and when.

So, Great run with Wayne Jensen, Great time post run with Mike Henze, always nice to spend some time away with my wife... Win-Win-Win.

Next up for me will be In Yan Teopa 10 Mile in Sept.

Weeks Weigh in 7-15-12

SW: 270 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 255

CW: 246
WL: -9lbs

Kind of surprised by this. I knew I had hit 246 on Friday, BUT.... i drank a lot of beer post Dances with Dirt 10K and coupled it with pizza and more cocktails at night I thought today would be higher... I am going to change my diet for the next 30 days and see what happens, cleaning it up a bit...  Hopeful to see a 215 maybe yet this year.. I am estactic for every lb off with every bit of strength gained.

Afton trail 25K Race report

Saturday I toed the line at my first trail race since 2009. The distance was 25K (15.5 Miles) the surface trails with a cumulative elevation change just shy of 5,000 feet (so not a lot in my opinion but much more than the average runner would expect in a race), my time was 3:35:28 which is certainly not the fastest time I would have ever ran one of these but still averages out to 13:50 mile roughly.  Considering I went in to this race under-trained and one month calendar date from my last Cytoxan treatment I am more than just very pleased, I am ecstatic. I still deal with some small SLE and Neuro  issues most days but for the most part I feel very strong with all last year’s treatments  considered. Attached is a profile of the course in how the hills are.  This gives me a lot of hope that I will continue to have what I consider to be normalcy in my life and why a patient should never discount tomorrow. I believe I will be a better Lupus patient in the future knowing that even if I have a really bad flare again to not give up as my chances are good to be back out enjoying the trails, this race and my past flare also remind me to take as good of care of yourself as possible it can only help you in the future. While physically struggling a bit in my last climb I couldn’t help but to think of how much Lupus and trail running have in common, all you need to do is believe in yourself, do your best to take care of yourself and remember constant forward motion are what will get you to the finish line.

Lesson learned from a running stand point, I have a lot of work in front of me before Sawtooth 100 Mile Sept 6th 2013, although this course has a lot of small hills for the most part this trail is very easy (far easier than any trail that I train on in La Crosse) and with any sort of conditioning the only thing that adds any difficulty to a trained trail runner would be the heat that could come in July, fortunately for me it did not happen this year, the running gods smiled on me and gave me better results than I deserved, but with a sense of humility to train with coming out of it based on my lack there of hill strength. I have also possibly removed this from my race schedule next year, maybe I go up and volunteer instead or run a strong 25? I am not sure if this qualifies as a good training race for Sawtooth; devils advocate could say that it might still make one as long as you run it as it would give me more running than other midwest trail races but I noticed the trail also seemed to have a lot of camber to it which I tend to get injured with... still think I volunteer and then maybe run the Dances with Dirt 50K as a training run instead the following week... well enough babbling

Weeks weigh in 7-7-12

SW: 270 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 254

CW: 255
WL: +1 lb

 No concerns here,  I was really 251 last night, so I will see how much of this is inflammation post race or if I was just deydrated post run and was smart enough to get my hydration up, I believe it is more of the latter. I also did not focus on losing to much this past week, going into a 25K I did not want to cause a nutrition change that would bonk me early and cause more than normal difficulty in my race.

Power Walking

I am going to start adding one day a week right now of power walking 2 miles the goal is 15:00 once that becomes comfortable I will work on getting 4 miles at 1 hour and then eventually 5 miles in an hour. I think once I get the 2 miles at 30 fairly strong I will work on power walking the climbs at Hixon no running just power walk repeats.. this can add two days to my weekly running. and prepare me more for winter power hiking as well.

Weight Loss 7-1-12

 

SW: 270 (6-3-12)

GW: 195 9-6-13 

LW: 255

CW: 254
WL: -1 lb

Actually weighed in after yesterdays run at 251 but that was not good as I weighed in before the run at 255. I did a 2:39 minutes 9.78 mile rum with Climb of +2066/-1995 temp was upper 80' lower 90's and humid. I was really tired from the start of this run and found myself being lazy at the top of every little or large hill that I would walk, i kept walking as soon as I noticed it I reminded myself of my goals and to walk those areas were not conducive to my goals. I am pretty pleased since it remained at a 16:40ish pace over all not eh 15 pace I wanted but I was foolish to expect that, I am in more of a 17:50 pace condition so actually I pushed pretty good. I focused on that over all pace the whole way. I need to learn how to power walk maybe one day a week I will try a 2 mile power walk. But not this week. this weekend I have a 25K that I am grossly untrained for hoping for a 4:30 or better but I see the reality being 5:00 since it is very likely to be in the middle 90's that day.  I think I am going to keep this week extra light 2 runs of 3 miles and walk the dog a few miles each day.

Lost Focus

Somehow I have lost my focus on loosing the weight and have only been looking at the exercise portion. Looking forward into 2013 I am looking at the http://www.umtr.net/trail-series/umtr-ultra-series/ and see how well I do, which looking at this makes me think wow I need to loose some weight and now. I am at 256 that is up 3 lbs form 2 weeks ago... the culprit is booze which then leads to junk food. I am ready to empty the house of junk food and get back to lowering my fat level.

I would also like to if financially and physically plus if it works with My wife's schedule after all none of this is possible with out the loving support of my wife.  Go up to crew Sawtooth this year and somehow work at Arrowhead in some capacity to get an idea.

Others that could be added, would be one of the distances at Birkiebiner this winter and possibly a dances with dirt 1/2 Marathon or 50K next year, that one could depend on how I am recovered from Afton.
Once again all of these as training runs not racing except Sawtooth.

UMTR Ultra Series

The UMTR Ultra Series is a series of ultra trail races throughout the upper Midwest.

These are 2012 dates and I have erased all but the ones I would like to do not as a race but use them as a series of training runs.

Race	Location	Date
Zumbro 100 Mile / 50 Mile	Zumbro Falls, MN	04/13/2012   50 Mile
Chippewa 50K	New Auburn,         WI	04/28/2012
Superior Trail 50K	Lutsen, MN	05/19/2012
Kettle Moraine 100K / 100 Mile	Eagle, WI	06/02/2012  100K
Afton 50K	Afton, MN	07/07/2012
Voyageur 50 Mile	Carlton, MN	07/28/2012
Marquette 50K / 50 Mile	Marquette, MI	08/18/2012 Not sure could use as last long run prior to Sawtooth and Taper in.
Sawtooth 100 Mile	Lutsen, MN	09/07/2012  (GOAL RACE) goal being sub 30
Arrowhead 135 Run		2/??/2013  (GOAL RACE) goal being Finish in time allowed

Weight loss 6-24-12

SW: 270 (6-3-12)
GW: 195 9-6-13
LW: 253
CW: 255
+ 2 lbs

had a good week of running, every run was tough in effort but I toughed out every run. a little too much celebrating with my wife on Friday and Saturday Night.

Rethinking my plans for running this next month. I dont think I am camping at Devils Lake, Renee wants to come watch me run which is really cool. So I think I will just show up. Not sure of distance either thinking maybe about the 1/2 I am also contemplating the 25K the week prior at Afton.

Fantastic 6 mile run this morning

Went out to Hixon and ran the Hickory to Bliss road and back route just a shy bit over 6.2 miles... and averages 12 min miles. I am extremely pleased with that time today, I really thought it would be closer to the 15 minute mark with the hills but I was able to run them all but 1 and a half of them and honestly I think I could of ran the 1/2 hill as well but was hoping to keep some fuel in the tank for the remainder of the run. Pleased to say the least.

Building up

I need to focus on the build up in time on the trails starting now not wait until I am in better shape next spring.

So my thoughts are like this.

I currently just completed 10.5 miles in 3:13. So what I think I will do is slowing start building off of that base every other weekend and the weekend in between start to build some speed on the trails in the form of a 1 - 1 1/2 hour run  and during the week add 2-3 short walks a day with cooper 9which I have been doing already) and adding in 2-3 1 hour runs in as well. until I have that long day built up to 8-10 hours and then by then I can focus a bit more on sharpening the saw all next summer and continue to build strength and cardio through out the winter in and on the snow packed trails and deeper trails in the woods.

2 days out

I am two days out this morning from my long run/ hike and I am up 3 lbs, I think I remember being up in weight for a week or so when ever I would do a longer than usual run. I sure hope this is it and it is just some general inflammation that my body has to dump. I have been almost 30-40 ounces of water to the plus side of my 64 ounce a day goal. and had a very tiny amount of cheating while with my dad only one beer and none the day before at my wifes cousins wedding shower I passed on all junk food and booze. I am acceptable of a stagnant for awhile as long as it is not a long term trend. I really, really, really want to get to 240 sooner rather than later, once I break that I know I drop a pant size and am only 15 away from 225 and so on and so on. but going from 253 to 256 really bummed me out.

Weightloss 6-17-12

SW: 270 (6-3-12)
GW: 195 9-6-13
LW: 257
CW: 253
WL: -4 lbs solid week of dieting, if anything too much fruit and an over abundance of water. I did not cheat once that I can think of when it come to foods and I only had one beer but that was after 6 plus ours of yard works and my sister was here, I could have gone without. Yesterday I was a at wedding shower and did not have any booze, no desserts  I think maybe I should of had a bit more of the protein than I did. but I was amazingly strong as I was even making drinks for a few. Those captain and cokes were calling my name in a loud voice... passed!

Goals for this week

3 1 hour run our hikes and a 2-3 hour again in Hixon again with all of the hills TNT, PP, Brighton, Aspen Huff,  and then take the back side around. They are CLEARLY not my strength right now and I have always thought that you should work more on your weaknesses than your strengths. and then continue to build on to your strengths.

trail time with friends

What a great way to start out my Saturday. I met Wayne and Brian at 8 AM today and started on what was supposed to be a 10 mile hike. I am happy to report that it turned into a 10 1/2 mile trail run/hike. still walked all the up hills and struggled on many of the steep ones. But most of the nice easy flats and downs were ran with a smile. I was definitely tired at the end but with that being said if It would have been 3 miles longer I could have made it as well, however I had run out of my 64 ounces of water in my hydration pack at the end.
The vitals:
253lbs
70 plus degrees
constant rain
three stops for photos of the views.
10.5 miles
3:13:28
18:26 avg pace
1590 calories burned
 These are from Garmin so a bit higher than actual but, but probably only by 500 each side.
Total ascent: 3604
Total descent: 3664

Used to do this loop in about 2:00- 2:10

Morning weight

Was pleased to see 257 on the scale again this morning, well as pleased as one should be with 257 on the scale. I was not sure since I treated myself to a decent size skillet Breakfast yesterday including a bloody mary as well as the Tacos with cheese on them last night.

Weekly goals:

lose 2-3 lbs
Hike 5 hours this week
Continue to fly right on my diet
Mix in a bit of balance in the rest of my life as well

Weight Loss Thread

SW: 270 (6-3-12)
GW: 195 9-6-13
CW: 257
WL: -13 lbs

That was a lot of poison that had to have left me.

Possible trail run schedule

I say trail run rather than race, because I would not even be in contention walking up to the line, not that I ever was before in a race especially in these distances.. but in the condition I am in now I consider these organized fun trail runs on trails that I have never been on.

June 23^rd William O’ Brien 10 Mile (least likely)

July 14^th Dances with Dirt 10K

July 28^th Winona Trail Scamper 5K                                        

Sept 22^nd In Yan Teopa 10 Mile

Wow Crazy

I must have been loaded with Poison and crap in me. It has not been even a week and I have lost 10lbs, I keep thinking that I will wake up and be back up a few lbs as this all stabilizes, but maybe not.

I have been trying different methods for healing this week. I started drinking tea. I am reading a lot about the health benefits to teas and other things like honey and cinnamon etc.. that offer so much natural relief to common problems even muscle inflammation. So I will continue you onward and upward learning and taking in more knowledge to treat myself. I am only on one pill right now and that is the standard drug for Lupus called plaquenil, I do take a few other meds off and on because of the Cytoxan but those are pills that are keeping me out of infection or helping with nausea.. so I know that once the last dose of Cytoxan leaves my body this go around that I should be down to just plaquenil, hoping to avoid the addition of cellcept and or Benlysta afterwards, so anything I can do for myself to prevent I will do.

Food Journal 5-6-2012

Breakfast: two serving of plain oatmeal I added 1 large teaspoon of Brown Sugar and one of honey
Snack: 1/2 mini bagel with peanut butter and 1/2 of a banana
Lunch: Egg and hummus salad on a white wrap 1 cup of brown rice
Snack: Apple and mini bagel
Dinner: half of a grilled chicken breast and a salad.

64 ounces of water

heart rate and acupuncture

Ever since my acupuncture session on Monday, my resting heart rate has been a steady 20 beats below 100. I need to look at these victories and stay a course. Weighed in this morning and I have lost 6 lbs of poison this week. I say poison because I know that I can not loose 6lbs of fat in like 3 days. My shoulder has seemed to get better as well, not healed but not excruciating sore with every movement. I have forgotten to take my plaquenil the past few days and my body does seem pretty angry, I have to make sure that I am taking those. I also need to lay out a Yoga and PT program for my right hip pretty tender and sore I still think that I have a muscle imbalance and my right leg is turning outward, if I force my right foot t be held in a more forward facing position that is when it really get sore. Time to work on building those muscle sets and stretching and icing them as well.

Todays meals 06-05-12

Breakfast: two servings of plain oatmeal, I added about a table spoon of brown sugar and another of honey.

Snack: mini bagel and a green apple

Lunch: I had a hard boiled egg mixed up with greek olive humus and put on a white tortilla and approx a cup of brown rice.

Snack: chocolate milk, half of a mini bagel with fresh ground peanut butter on it.

Dinner: half of a grilled chicken breast with a greens salad

Accupuncture session

Had my first session yesterday I let her know to focus on my right knee and IT band area, also my heart rate. She had said that my body was really warm (not feverish) but warm. after about an hour of acupuncture my heart rate was down almost by 20 beats and my body cooled down a lot. This morning I woke up checked my HR and it was still down and even more. pretty sore all over right now now I can tell my body is angry inside still but I think this is just a general all over inflammation not sure stress related to past diet and life mistakes or if it is Lupus but either way I am noting it and making the appropriate changes. was down 3 lbs this morning so that much less poison sitting inside me right now.

Doing things properly.

Or as the Medical Oath goes; Do no Harm!


Well I need to set some ground rules for myself if I plan on getting the weight off. I am smart enough to know that when I was peaking at mileage I still did not loose weight. It is more diet than anything.

So My ground Rules:

Oatmeal with some brown sugar and honey for breakfast, maybe piece of toast or egg as well.
Snack: I think I will stick with a chocolate milk and a banana or 1/2 banana
Lunch: a lean Protein source with some raw veggies and dip
Snack: peanut butter or similar on bagel (or close too)
Dinner: mostly veggies and or whole grains small serving of lean protein if any at all.

I need to consume 64 ounces of water, not crystal light but water!!!!

Cocktails to a bare minimum, and limit to a better beer, a better scotch, possibly a bloody ceaser on occasion with the proper breakfast as a reward. I use the term better because I am cheap and that means very little of it will be consumed.

So if nothing else, and Lupus is playing not so nice with me, at least I am not doing Harm.

Penciling in..

I am penciling in Sawtooth 2013 on my calendar right now, which means a few things. Lupus Really needs to leave or go into deep Remission NOW, I need to lose a lot of weight and take this serious, I need to really get into shape and take advantage of all opportunities and last but not least smile the whole time!

Weigh in

Well tomorrow is my official weigh in but since I will not be here to do it, I weighed this morning. My metabolism must really suck or I suck becuase I cheated to much this week, or option 3 which I think is part of the equation I have some inflammation right now from Lupus. I weighed in at 270, that is what I started the week at. I was down to 266 at one point. I will also total 25-30 miles with walking and running combined this week. Next week will be less and the following will be down again because of my chemo on Thursday. I need to get this weight off!!! To much weight for my frame.

5 trail run/walk

With my friends Joe and Wayne from the rubber mills over to hixon, ugly as far as a run goes from my previous standards, but I love it, sucky-ness and all! :) Strength will come out of this. Never wanted to be fast, just strong and efficient.

THank goodness Memorial day weekend is over

I went from a Sunday Morning weigh in of 265 to a Tuesday weigh in of 270. Wow so much more to lose. Oh well it does not scare me but I need to be lazer focused right now. I am hoping to run 3-4 times a week, lift 2-3 times a week, Core 3 times a week all very light just getting my body back into accepting muscular change.

Happy running and life to you

weekly weigh in

start weight: 270 on May 1 2012
Goal Weight: 190 by mid year 2013
last week: 258
Current weight: 265
Weeks change: +7
Total loss: -5lbs

Yeah that is productive... :) not getting myself down over this.

3 days straight of running

all very short but all accomplished with a smile and thoughts of I have built this before I can do again. my total is only about 7 + or - miles tomorrow I will walk instead, I can feel it in my shins and ankles not to mention hip and knee that always bothers me. but I am happy and determined. Now if I can just get some weight off.

Short Trail run/walk

Very short only about 2.5 miles but still it felt good to say I was out there.

+ 7 lbs

why is it thta i decide to lose  weight and i gain instead, seven pounds up. ok let's try this again. i know the problem is me not me. make sense? i need to get pass the if i am not exercising why bother, i am worth it and i am smart enough to know that diet is more important than exercise when it comes to losing weight. oh well beat myself up a bit and move forward.

Time to lose again

Well my highest was at 270 again that I know of, plus or minus 1.

I am at 258 this morning and really am focused on 210ish but will be happy when I see 240's first. Let see if I can put together a long enough string of mentally good days to make this happen.

Ultra Running

Even though I am not "running" my mind is so focused on Ultra Running right now. It is fun seeing the races starting up again in this area. Today is the Superior Spring trail race 25K and 50K, man it would be fun to be up there running the trail right now. In a couple of weeks is FANS 24 Hour which is so Anti -Richard style of running but yet I feel some sense of need to do again just to have a better race. Have a good friend running it, I hope to have enough health to go set up tent next to his and cheer on and help crew in anyway.

Runners everywhere I look

Everywhere I looked today inside and out I saw people who were running or people I knew that were runners. soooooooooooooooo.............. I put on my Vibram KSO's and went for a one mile run walk with cooper, I ran probably 3/4 of it so I am happy. Hopefully there is not to much of a penance to pay for it. Felt good, I am soaking in sweat from one mile.

I have no idea, but I am paying attention

My body seems to be really angry right now. Not sure if it is the Chemo or if it is more Lupus activity, I am praying for the earlier of those two scenarios. Some how I have managed to loose 10-12 lbs in a few weeks with out trying and when I say not trying I mean I have been eating just as much if not more than my normal. Also last night I had really bad chest pains and shortness of breath when doing small bits of exercise (walking up a half flight of steps etc...  plus a bunch more that i wont even talk about on here that lead to other auto-immune disorders. I have heard that no one just has Lupus, once you have that your bodies immune system starts with other. I know that I have two Auto-immune disorders right now and who knows what on the horizon.   Now with that being said, I am pretty stubborn and strong willed and am not giving in to this crap just yet even though last night i just was ready to fold again. I have to beat this, for my own mind i have to I can not live like this the rest of my life. I am hoping upon hope that these "new" problems are just my body fighting back from Chemo and once this is all out of my system these will disappear. Anyways every morning I am going to check my resting heart rate and weight and try to figure out how does it equate to yesterday. today I was 95 bpm at rest Ughh, I remember having a 54 bpm about a year ago.. I have also seen this go away with me and then come back in the past 4 months where I had a high 100-115 bpm at rest and then weeks later at 68.. now i am back up.. who knows.. hoping I find a trend and can make the changes on my own.

Breakfast today will be oatmeal and a chamomile tea with honey for my throat, I read some pretty cool stuff on that tea yesterday.


well that's that.

Life lately

I really have not enjoyed life lately, I have been very close several times to saying screw you lupus you can have me. If the disease does not kick your ass then the meds and treatments do. I did pill form Chemo almost all last year and this year I started Cytoxan infusions. Well my opinion of those is terrible, the phrase what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger comes in to my mind as I think of those. I have one left and not looking forward to it. I am also not sure that I am willing to do the last one either. Honesty coming in to play, I know it helps my neurological problems as when i missed my last treatment i had to wait 2 weeks and problems were coming back. That is the sad part, so I have put myself through hell, lost my job because of Lupus and the problem is going to come back that quickly.  Any way nothing new to post on that BS.

I am looking to go back to real clean eating and get some of my feelgood back and am considering alternative methods of treatment as well. Not sure what that all means yet but I am examining life and I really do not want to go through more and more and more rounds of chemo.

Any who that is all.

First admitance

I am weak in the mind. I have somehow gone from a person who had no fears and was full of life to somebody who does not believe he has the ability to do anything and is afraid of failure at every turn. I need to regain my confidence and use it with humility.

Turning Point

I believe I am at a turning point in my life. Recently I have not lived up to my standards that I have preached and even promised.

From here on out I plan to better myself as a person, as a friend, as a husband, and as a member of this community. I have no idea how this journey will go other than "I will" (not, do my best to) stay on course. I truly deeply believe I have what it takes to be a Leader of high ethics. It is time to find the parts that either I am not using or building those habits.

There is so much wisdom to gain from those willing to share, we just need to want it bad enough to reach out and grab it.

Last night after Chemo

I ended up with a resting heart rate of 126-146, pain in chest, shortness of breath, terrible vision problems... ughh. That and one of my tests came back showing possible signs of either a kidney problem or possible diabetes... either way I am not very happy.

I probably should have gone into the ER last night but I had decided that if I did they would have admitted me like last time and I fear that any hospital stay would show more leave of absence here at work which most certainly end up with me being fired.

Chemo

Today heading back in for another 5-6 hour round of chemo. Here is to killing active Lupus.

Last night I was not sure if today was going to happen, got real sick and just felt like death. Thankful for the meds that I was prescribed for nausea due to chemo as they were strong enough to kick the sick it appears.

I really have such a hatred for me and what I have allowed to happen. I am not happy at this weight, and before anybody says just do some walking and eat better, I suggest you walk a mile with me and see what this degree of lupus is like.

As much as I don't want to swim I think I will end up being a swimmer maybe more than other things. What I really want is to be able to run, ski and bike Arrowhead 135. run the entire length of Superior Hiking trail, run the sustina 100 and maybe even run the Iditarod Invitational. I have taken Badwater off of my list as the thought of 135 miles on a road no longer appeals to me. I want an overly active life and I am so pissed that it seems I can not have it.

Poor Mood,

Another night of no sleep due to pain. How long will I have to live with Pain?

Is it too much to ask for a pain free period in my life? I don't think so!

The Mental game of Lupus and other chronic diseases

You can make all the plans you want for improving yourself physically with this disease. However first you better check your mental weakness points. I have been having plans for the last two weeks or so now to start cutting 60-70lbs off of me. Everytime I get that little burst or energy to do it, Lupus kicks in and kicks my ass mentally. I need to readjust my goals and be happy with them for now. I guess my first goal will be to not gain anymore weight over the next week with Superbowl and my love of eating constantly through that game. I am not going to penalize myself, but it would be nice to not gain anymore than I am at.

Give me the Strength

I need to find a way to mentally battle pain. I am loosing on all battlefields. It is so hard to stay strong when I have experienced it for over two years no with little to no relief at all times.

I have to get this weight off. I have to, I have to, I have to.

Pain is such a strong thing.

Since about Tuesday after my morning walk/run with Cooper on the trails I have been really sore in my hip and knee. What's new right? But even though I was told it was ok to push through it just nags at my soul. How long can one endure pain and keep a positive attitude? Well Pain has won again and I have been eating poorly.

I Met with my Rheumatologist and let him know that I was told the pain I am feeling is most likely not associated with the labral tears in my hip in which he agreed that they would not hurt as bad as i hurt. I let him know that the only thing that even seems to cut it is large doses of Ibuprofen which I know is an absolute NO for me with Lupus and the danger it plays into my Kidney. I mention stuff like this to him to hopefully get something other than Vicodin; which to me works about as well as tic tacs, I sereiously need to take 3 of them to evn get small relief. Yesterday he gave me a small tube to sample of Voltaren Gel. It is some sort of medicated gel you run on your joints ever 6 hours for relief. If it works I will get a prescription for it. I HOPE IT WORKS. I can not handle living in pain and I dont do well without getting outside for exercise. I can not handle indoor stuff, ugh bullet in my mouth.

So Voltaran gel, let's get this pain gone!!

So not in shape...

....but I knew that.

Woke up early to go for a walk/run with cooper in the fresh powder at Goose island north trail loop. 24 degrees very little wind. I struggled once again to even walk in the snow with micro spikes, but that is what I am improving so all good.

Thanks to my wife, I actually got out and did it. I was pretty darn comfortable in the bed, but she reminded me that i wanted to run and I think she knows that I need it.

Hip pain is still there, so this shot did noting in my opinion.

Cooper did pretty well for our first canicross style run. He is young so his mistakes are nothing but him being 5 months old and I think if I could have ran the whole time he would have stayed much more tight on the harness.

Monday Morning Weigh in "The scary truth"

Well, if I am going to make this easier on myself I need to get the extra poundage off of me. I have a lot of excess to get off before I am going to be satisfied but I will be ever so patient with it. I will be extremely happy with 2 lbs a week. I know I can do it if I stick to my guns.

Starting Weight: 261 
Goal Weight:195

Snow Dog and the New beginning

Cooper training for Skijoring next year

Well, I am back. Not even close to a hundred percent but my commitment to getting stronger has been rejuvenated. I have to give some huge credit to my Dr.'s although I am not in full remission, i feel strong enough to start the process.

First time hooked up to harness and all ready to go

This is my new training buddy. His Name is Cooper. in this picture he is 5 months old today about 70 lbs and absolutely is lover of snow and running. I have big hopes for him and I together. He just has a never ending bit of energy so I need to keep him moving.

Skijor harness will be bikejoring and canicross with this as well

My new beginnings are going to approach being an athlete rather than a runner. I want to be a runner more than anything, but I am not sure that pushing myself up into hi miles will be something that my body is going to accept willingly, so taking baby steps and becoming and all around more balanced, including mountain biking and swimming in the summer plus add in Yoga, Pilates weights etc.. I have made a commitment to avoid roads this year unless they are the only way to connect trail systems. I am also thinking that winter will be my primary time of year.

I had a awakening today that gives me hope. I have wanted Arrowhead for a long time now and after being diagnosed I have almost seen this be a nonexistent possibility. Now I have a reawakening. I still have the opportunity to try Arrowhead with Ski's or Bike. and who knows maybe running someday. I will take what ever path my body allows.

A little bit of catch up..

Well January is fast coming to a close and my life has not changed much as far as health but my attitude about my health is changing.

I am going through Chemo Therapy infusions at the hospital and they seem to be doing what they were meant to do. I dont feel like I have to sleep sitting at my desk near as often, my headaches are starting to tape, but in fairness i am trying out my 4th Migraine medicine and I believe it to be a winner.

Met with a second orthopedic to discuss the tears in my hip and their connection to my hip pain. He reviewed the results from my MRI and then put me through a quick series of tests. He told me that my Back has a fracture in the lumber vertebrae which I already knew, but that I also had a partially slipped disk and arthritis. He believes my back is the culprit. He was able to get me in same day for a Steroid shot into my Hip Joint, told me it would take a few days to know if it feeling better. The Dr. that did the shot let me know it was most likely being done as a diagnostic measure. The great news is the Orthopedic told me to get out and start moving as well as get my weight back off, i assured him that would not be a problem if I can exercise.

Stopped on the way home and ordered a pair of waxless back country XC Ski's and a harness arrived yesterday as well for Cooper, so Him and I can both get out and do some exercise together, I will have him pull my pulk this winter, get a mountain bike this summer teach him Bikejoring and transiton him back into Skijoring next Winter.

SO.. that brings up my next Topic that from here on out I will keep focused on for 20 months. The return of me to Sawtooth 100Mile and doing with Lupus. I normally would have just put it down for this year however I have a feeling that with my Lupus flaring off and on i should take this the slow way and learn how to do this. The biggest change I think for me is I believe that I am going to do this with a smaller mileage total, so my training will pretty much be based on hills. so i will count long hikes into it plus add in swimming, biking and weights. The other obstacles will be my hip and back. Have I mentioned I HATE CORE WORK!! but looks like it will be a necessary evil. Now the advantage i have is, I believe I am one of the mentally toughest people I have met so I know that part of the training does not need work anymore. (well not true Core work will take a strong will to push myself).

My plans are also to set up a Fund-raising page for the Lupus foundation and use my running to raise awareness and money.

So. that is what is new with me.